As a parent, I can only speak from my own experience. Every day I’m trying to make sure my own attention isn’t being pulled away by a phone or a screen, and I’m trying to do the same for my child. That is not an easy thing to do in the world we live in now.
But I’ve learned a few things along the way about how to make reading part of a family’s life, even with all of that pulling in the other direction.
It starts with you
If you want your child to be a reader, you have to model that behavior first.
That doesn’t mean your child will grow up to be an avid reader as a teenager. There are no guarantees in parenting, and reading is no exception. But if your kids never see you reading, if they never see it as something you make time for, they are far less likely to make time for it themselves. It’s the same as anything else you hope to pass along, whether that’s exercise, the way you handle stress, or the choices you make about food. Kids learn by watching.
In our house, the television stays off Monday through Friday. After dinner is set aside time for reading. My husband and I do the same thing, and because we are the ones doing it, it reinforces just how important that time is. Kids notice what their parents choose to do with a quiet evening.
Make books part of the house
The second piece is access. Your children need books within reach.
That doesn’t mean you need a home library or shelves overflowing with books. There are plenty of ways to build a small collection without spending much money at all, and most importantly, the library is always there too.
The library is a wonderful way to build the habit as a family. Pick a day, maybe once a month, and make it library day. If your schedule is already full between work and activities, start small. Even a couple of hours on a Saturday is enough to let your kids wander the shelves, ask a librarian a question, and walk out with a stack of books they picked themselves.
And that part matters. Don’t worry about whether the books they choose are at their reading level. Right now, the goal is building the habit and letting them enjoy it. A child who is excited about what they are holding is a child who is going to open the book. Trust me, that’s half the battle.
Protect the time
Getting the books home is only part of it. You also need dedicated time to actually read them.
In our family, that looks like everyone in the living room together, phones away or silenced, reading for whatever stretch of time we can manage. Some nights that’s thirty minutes. Some nights it is longer. If every day is not realistic, pick certain days of the week and protect those. The consistency is what turns it into a habit rather than something that happens if there’s time left over.
Meet your child where they are
I want to say this clearly, because it matters as much for kids as it does for adults. Try to stay away from a required number of books.
Every child is different. Some younger kids move through picture books quickly. Some older kids are more reluctant. Setting a number can turn reading into another task to finish rather than something they actually enjoy. What matters far more is meeting your child where they are and letting them read what genuinely interests them.
What this can look like by age
Elementary school
This is often where the habit takes root. Picture books are a wonderful place to start, and reading together is one of the best parts of this age. I read to my son every night well into middle school, and it became something we both looked forward to.
From there, chapter books and series open up a lot of doors. Kids this age often love following the same characters across several books, and that kind of momentum can carry a reluctant reader a long way. Let them choose the series. Let them reread the ones they love. None of that is wasted time.
Middle school
This is often when independent reading really starts to take shape, and it is also when a lot of kids begin pulling away from books in favor of screens. Keeping the habit alive here often means finding books your child actually wants to read rather than what you think they should be reading.
Reading the same book together, even at this age, can open up conversations you might not otherwise have. It does not need to feel like a quiz. It is simply a chance to ask what they thought, what surprised them, or what they would have done differently.
Teens
This is where it can get trickier, and where a lot of parents feel the most disconnected. What your teenager wants to read may not be what you would choose for yourself, and that’s okay. Knowing what they are reading still gives you a window into their world and can open up conversations about different perspectives, different experiences, and different ways of seeing things.
The goal at this age is not control. It is staying curious about what your teen is drawn to and letting that be enough of a reason to talk about it.
Keeping a record together
I’ve talked before about keeping a reading journal as an adult, and the same idea works wonderfully for kids. It doesn’t need to be anything formal. Title, author, maybe whether it was part of a series. For younger kids, you might ask what their favorite part was and write it down for them. That alone builds a habit of thinking a little more deeply about what they just read.
The version I created for adults works well here too. You can simply adapt it to fit your child’s age and reading level. Let your kids pick out their own journal, add stickers, and decorate the cover. Keeping this analog, rather than using a reading app on a phone or tablet, matters more than it might seem. It is far too easy for a few minutes on a reading app to turn into a few minutes on something else entirely.
The habit is the point
None of this requires perfection. Some weeks will look exactly like what I described here. Other weeks won’t happen at all, and that is fine too.
What matters is that you are building the conditions for reading to have a place in your child’s life. The books are there, the time is protected, even if only in small pieces. And the choice of what to read belongs to them.
That is how a reader is raised. Not with a number to hit, but with a habit that has room to grow.
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